Or, Why Does This Keep Happening To Me?
Are you one of those folks who tend to run into the same old problems, again and again? Does your emotional belly button keep getting pushed, over and over, no matter what you do?
Bummer. Why do you suppose that’s happening?
Could it be your guru forgot to give you some special little key to life? Perhaps your copy of The Secret had a page missing!
If only that were the case. No, what’s really going on is you’re living in the cosmic gem tumbler we call Earth School, and you are a diamond in the rough getting processed. And despite how tedious the sanding may feel some days, you’re actually pretty far along. Consider this:
When an old soul like you comes for a life in Earth School, you sign off on an agenda. Your agenda might include things like:
- What you agree to accomplish
- Strengths you’re going to develop
- Lessons to learn
- Stuff from other lifetimes to balance out
- Who you’ll be meeting and helping
- Who’ll be helping you
- What you’re willing to take on for the greater good of humanity
- And much, much more!
And all of this happens by agreement between your soul and God. But of course God, being God, gets to have the final say.
Now, for a new soul going to Earth School for the first time, the agenda might not look like much. They might just tell you, “OK, Newby. Go down there and get some seat time as a human.” A new soul is a bit like a seed from a mystery bag—we don’t know what it’s going to look like till it starts to sprout. But as you go through many lifetimes, your experience, combined with your individual spark of the Divine, causes you to blossom as a unique human being. And the more unique you become, the more specific your agenda for Earth School needs to be.
And so eventually, as you get some history behind you, your soul starts to take shape, and you develop character. Unfortunately, by the time your soul has been in play long enough for you to become a nicely filled out human being, you’ve also accumulated enough excess baggage to keep you stuck here.
Put another way, you’ve been on a long journey that started way back in God’s heart, led you deep into duality, and is now leading you back into God’s heart again. The entrance is within reach, but you have to let go of your baggage before you can get in. At this stage, lightening your load is what being processed in the tumbler is all about.
Which brings us back to the question: “Why does this keep happening to me?”
As part of the Earth School curriculum, life is set up to call your attention to anything within you that does not support your highest potential. Fear, anger, arrogance, judgment… whatever your Achilles heel happens to be, that’s what life will place in your face. And it will keep drawing your attention there until you’ve learned to release the pattern, through and through. In other words, God loves you and wants you back home so much that He’s set up Creation to squeeze out anything within you that keeps you stuck here. Of course, it can hurt to get squeezed, especially where you’re already tender. But pain does have a way of getting one’s attention. When you hurt enough to try just about anything to break free, that’s about the time you might finally be willing to ditch those negative patterns, go into your heart, and find your way home.
When a rock has had most of its rough edges worn off in a gem tumbler, it begins to resemble the fine gemstone it’s becoming. And when a human being notices that the same issues keep coming up over and over again in her life, she eventually begins to suspect a larger plan is somehow at work. That’s when she starts looking inside for answers. It can take lifetimes of struggle to get to that point. But once there, it’s just a matter of following the breadcrumbs home.
There is a massive amount of spiritual support available within to help you find your way home. How well you’re able to take advantage of the support depends on how you choose to respond when that same old grit comes around to process you. Letting go, trusting, and surrendering makes it easy for Spirit to help heal the old wounds and mold you into shape. Struggling, scheming, and going round in your head keeps you handcuffed to your baggage. One way or another Love will eventually have its way with you. It’s just a question of time.
By the way, all of that excess baggage we’ve been talking about is part of your ego, which turns out to be the biggest thing in the way of your return trip. In principle you might be willing to move out of your ego and follow your heart home. But your ego desperately wants to stay in charge, and it will find a million ways to hold you hostage, most of which include some form of fear tactic.
When you’re finally ready to go home, it’s important to find those who can help you really begin to get some freedom from your ego, and learn to trust. Not to trust as an intellectual idea, but to know, solidly within you, that all is well and you are loved, full time. Breaking free is not easy, and that’s why getting help is crucial. We’re not meant to do this all by ourselves anyway, and what would be the point?
Now that your life plan is getting more specific, you’re tumbling in Earth School with finer grit. Add some friends into the tumbler, and you’re “Rollin’ With Your Homies”. It’s quite a process getting shaped into that fine diamond, but if you’re reading this, chances are you’re well on your way. Rock on!